The most outrageous items in this year’s Goop holiday gift guide

If you’re looking for Christmas or Hanukkah presents for your loved one – especially if you’re a fan of extremely expensive items promoting dubious health claims – look no further than this year’s Goop Holiday Gift Guide.

Gwyneth Paltrow’s iconic wellness company has struggled in recent years – but her annual guide to the holiday season remains as iconic as ever.

“Our goal with our annual gift guides is to make holiday shopping personal, thoughtful, and more than a little playful, so that finding the gifts is as much fun as giving—and receiving—them,” the official intro to Goop’s holiday guide reads.

“Here you’ll find the fruits of a year’s worth of serious gifting research: genius tech, bucket-list journeys, little (and not-so-little) luxuries for their closet, their beauty bag, their kitchen counter—we have something for everyone, all in one place.”

The Goop guide is divided into several sub-guides, including the conventional (Gifts for Him and Her), and the quintessentially Gwyneth (the Lover’s Gift Guide, which features eight vibrators and a sex pillow.) Despite Goop’s pricey reputation, there’s even an Under $100 guide.

Read to learn more about the most ridiculous, outrageous, and luxurious gifts highlighted in this year’s Goop Holiday Gift Guide.

Dating Coaching with Amy Nobile Messing

For the low cost of $25,000, you can purchase a four month dating course with expert Amy Nobile Messing. The best selling author promises to teach the gift’s recipient “the secrets to bantering online” and provide “analysis of how a budding connection is going.”

The Prim

This $195 sex pillow was designed by Natalie Walz, the founder of Tabu, after a conversation with her mother about how “people were struggling to maintain their sex lives during menopause.” The Prim is one of several products produced by Tabu to assist on that quest – the memory foam pillow is meant to make sex more comfortable. The pillow’s linen cover comes in “blush” or “neutral,” ensuring it “looks right at home on your bed when you’re not using it.”

Aer1 System

The Aer1 System provides an answer to a timeless question: what happens when you’re on the go and you need sparkling water, but there’s none available? Well, for $99 you can buy this “first-of-its-kind device.” The Aer1 System consists of a stainless steel water bottle, 15 carbon capsules, a capsule holder, and a carbonation device which allows you to to create a bottle of fresh sparkling water in just a few short minutes.

Advanced Midnight Pickleball Paddle

This $95 pickleball paddle is featured on Goop’s 2024 Men’s Gift Guide – proving that men aren’t that hard to shop for after all. Constructed with a fiberglass exterior and a honeycomb core, the paddle “has an elongated design that helps generate power and spin.” If you’re hoping for something a bit snazzier than a basic black paddle, the Goop website also advertises a $98 variant with a green olive print.

HigherDOSE Red Light Hat

Another pick from the Men’s Gift Guide – this specially designed $449 baseball cap is intended to fight the scourge of hair loss. The cap’s interior is fitted with “panels that emit 650 nanometers of red light,” – which supposedly will rejuvenate hair follicles, when worn for 10 minutes each day.

The Lisa Yang Amsterdam Cushion

At first glance this beige-colored pillow appears to be a normal piece of living room decor. At second glance it seems delightfully luxurious: designed by one of the fashion world’s foremost purveyors of cashmere products, this pillow is made entirely of the luxurious downy wool. At third glance it seems outrageously expensive: the 17.7 inch by 17.7 inch pillow costs $530.

FireLight Infrared Sauna

This beige FireLight infrared sauna is almost reminiscent of a child’s living room fort. The $3,900 product is intended for people who want a spa-like experience, but don’t have the space for a traditional sauna in their homes. The portable spa has four levels of intensity and its height is adjustable to the user’s preferences.

Meditation Bench

If someone you love is making a New Year’s resolution to be more mindful, this is the perfect gift. The $448 bench, built from 100% Japanese cypress wood, “subtly tilts your hips forward to promote a natural lower back curve,” which allows for a longer meditation time.